Taco Belle, my faithful and constant companion for the last nine years has gone over the rainbow bridge. she was a damn good dog and i will miss her. hell, i miss her already. i keep catching myself heading toward the back door to let her in when i get home from running errands or getting groceries. i keep looking over to her preferred spot on the couch and wishing she was still there so i could reach over and pet her for a while. she’s been gone 3 days now and i am realizing how much i talked to her when no one else was around.
i have considered her end at different times. she was getting long in the tooth and her snout was growing as grey as mine. i didn’t think it would hurt like this, though. apparently i love that little dog. i’ve had other dogs throughout my life that passed and though i was sad they died, it didn’t hit me like this has. i don’t know if i’m getting soft in my old age, or if it’s that i had her longer than both my marriages lasted combined, or that i figured i had at least a couple more years with her, but i’m crushed.
i’m glad she went quickly, though. i wouldn’t want her to suffer and not understand why. and i feel blessed that she and i had several great days together before she left me. she wasn’t feeling great on the first day of the year, but i didn’t have to be anywhere til late afternoon and we cuddled up all day while i was writing. i snuck her some chicken and she barked at the neighbors who had the nerve to walk past our house. i’m glad i got to spend that time with her. my only regret is that i wasn’t there when she went into distress. i hate that she was probably scared and i was driving across Texas to pick up my kiddos.
they, these pets of ours, really do become part of our family, don’t they? in my case, with my life the way it is, Taco was the only one that was here all the time. and now that she’s gone, there is a furry 12 pound hole right through me.
i know it’s probably silly to be shook up over a dog, but she was my girl.
ghost